Roots of My Dreams

Roots of My Dreams

In the cool grey of the morning
I wake
Thoughts of you still on my mind
Dreams lingering
From a lonely night behind
Not able to take all the wonders and why's

In the cool grey of the morning
I hope.
Hoping that today,
I won't break down.
Ushering in signs of new life,
New times,
New adventures with you around.

In the midst of the day,
I stop,
Beginning to think of you,
My heart stumbles.
Struggling to find the words,
Searching for your heart.

In the midst of the day,
I wait,
To hear of a moment,
Filled with new things
Of new days and,
New memories of us together.

In the midst of the day,
I wish.
For these dreams
To come from your heart.
To see it in your eyes, so precious.
With words spoken by your lips.

In the silence of the night,
I see,
The end of a day where,
I'm still looking for the touch of your hand.
Like an angel from heaven,
With dreams of our love.

In the silence of the night,
I hear,
Angels' voices singing.
Speaking your name.
Over and over again,
Over and over again.

In the silence of the night,
I hear,
The echo of your words,
Lingering on my heart.
Causing me,
To hold fast hope tonight.

In the silence of the night,
I fall,
Slipping beneath the sound,
Of one heart beating.
Reminding me of what I'm fighting for.
Two hearts united, rooted in dreams.

A Moment of Imperfect Clarity

A Moment of Imperfect Clarity

It's so hard, in these hours alone,
Not to let the silence take you from home
To distract yourself from all the imperfections
That are cast on the water as a reflection
Of what looks only to be a fractured life
Full of decisions that caused nothing but strife
Now, I try to remember that God promises a fulness unknown
But really, that's the hardest because,
It seems like when you finally see it, it's gone...
like lightning
Falling from the sky
You fall with it,
Letting out quite an unremarkable cry
And when you do finally hit the ground
Your ears go deaf from the sound
But not from the noise all around
From the scream within your soul that resounds
And your eyes, in kind,
Start going blind
From the tears that are wept unseen
Losing hope from the lies that make up
So many broken dreams
Tell me, what's the secret?
I promise, I can keep it...
Please. Don't make me fake it,
I know love can break it
Break the cycle of a shattered existence
Longing only to create some distance
Between a past that plagues me
And a place away from this insanity
A moment in time that does not conform me
To a world that wishes only to devour me
Away from a sanctuary with correct theology
But instead, I seek Your heart, Your serenity
Because,
Jah, in the end,
With You I find acceptance
A return to innocence
Lord God, You are my refuge, my solace,
The very reason for my existence...

The Alchemy Index

The Alchemy Index

Tell me are you free
Or has this deluge overtaken me?
This absolute depravity.
Is your heart marked with fear?
Is it marked with trembling?
Here I am God
Lift my soul
Let love saturate
Touch my heart
Touch my soul
I want to walk beneath the fear
That is pushing me, pushing in
Your love that never ends
Because You're alive, and
I am not alone!
You've called out my days,
I am known.
No longer will the dead stay that way
No longer will my soul scream
Just for a glimpse of the unseen
Your love is moving us from in between
So I cry out
This is my alchemy index
Changing my heart
From stone to flesh

The Sufferer & The Witness

The Sufferer & The Witness

Would you know my name if,
I never came out on the winners' side again?
Recently this season of defeat & ideas of loss
Pierce my thoughts about what has been
What will be, what will never be again.

In a night so reckless, thoughts come witless
Crashing down around my feet
Along with the will to overcome defeat
So now the curtain falls but I still sing
Echoes of the Spirit act as a harbinger of what He may bring

I know now who You are, despite all the scars
You are the endurance of the Saints
The beating of our hearts, giving us a name
You are the Sufferer, the Witness, our Catalyst
My God, the Lord is with us

Like A Whisper

Like A Whisper

Today,
My heart cries out
Though it may sound like a whisper, Because
The weight of what I should've done
In that very moment
Comes crashing in.
So my heart calls out
Calls out to You like a child
God, I just want to do the right thing
But the right thing never feels real
It's like life only speaks in riddles
So outside, I cry out for attention
While inside I just try to hide
And forget about all the times
I knew the right thing
But I never even tried
And within those moments,
I write the epitaph
For a life less lived
Where forever
I'll bare
the moniker
of
The infamous hypocrite known as me.

The Lost World

The Lost World

We have all gone astray - We have shunned the Lord
Looking for truth in so many different places
We have all gone our own way, though his spirit poured
We get confronted by so many different faces

Who has believed Him?
Who has seen the Light of Life?
By His wounds we are healed,
For our peace, He was crucified

And as I wander through the lost world
I see so little hope, such little faith
As I wander through the lost world, I know
I'll never find my home if I'm without Your grace

Masquerade, lack of hope - place it in a lie
There's got to be something more to this life
Shut the door, close the mind - changing like the tide
There's no such thing as the eternal high

Who has believed Him? Led like a lamb to the slaughter
Oppressed and afflicted, He poured out His life unto death

And as I wander through the lost world
I see so little hope, such little faith
As I wander through the lost world, I know
I'll never find my home if I'm without Your grace

Come all who are thirsty, drink and you will see
For the god of this generation, has made us blind!

Who has believed Him?
Who has seen the Light of Life?
By His wounds we are healed,
For the punishment that brought us peace - He was crucified!

=================================================
based on Isaiah 53 & 2 Corinthians 4:4
written by Mike Abramson & Lance Miller...

Sustain Me

another old one that Lance and I wrote. this was actually a really good song...

Sustain Me

O wash me, O Lord
Cleanse me of this guilt
Let me hold on again
Cause I admit my shameful deeds

Only Your power could sustain me
Only Your love could mend my brokenness
Only Your grace could save me
Only Your grace could put my soul to rest

I come to you on bended knee
My face is to the ground
I'm finding you despite all of this
Now I long to lift Your holy name

Only Your power could sustain me
Only Your love could mend my brokenness
Only Your grace could save me
Only Your grace could put my soul to rest

Send Your forgiveness
Let it reign down on me
Shower me with Your love
Fulfill my every need

Only Your power could sustain me
Only Your love could mend my brokenness
Only Your grace could save me
Only Your grace could put my soul to rest

I'm washed
I'm cleansed
I'm filled
I breathe again
I believe
I am free
I will live
Eternally

My Will Be A Dead Man

My Will Be A Dead Man

There comes a time
When I must murder my will
I cry out to God –
RETURN, RETURN, RETURN
Take from me this struggle
God, my will be a dead man

On this day, on this profession
On Your sacrifice, on Your Son
With this bloody Messiah
Show me Your sorrow
Illuminate my eyes with Your love
Paint this landscape with Your blood

I’m still learning what it’s like to be free
It can no longer be me against me
How I must be consumed for the sake of You
This will be my legacy - let it take all of me
Show me who I am in the depths of Spirit and truth
Cause I've seen the face of redemption; I know it's You

Never Mine: A Song of Redemption

I'm tired, can't keep focus anymore
I resisted, grabbed the reins and took control
It's brought me, nothing but wasted time
Leaving me alone and incomplete

Take this
My soul, My life
Take this
My all, it was never mine

I failed, threw it all way, but
You salvaged the broken, You made me whole
Now I wash my hands of my own existence
And I lay it at your feet...

Take this
My soul, My life
Take this
My all, it was never mine

This is my cry for freedom
This is my song of redemption
Because my heart isn't pure
And this could be my last shot at love...

=====================================

most of this was a song from my old band - Simplex Method. I can't remember who was the primary write (though it was probably Lance), however I redid some of it and also contributed at its inception back in the day.

Chasing After the Wind

Music is an indirect force for change, because it provides an anchor against human tragedy. In this sense, it works towards a reconciled world. It can also be the direct experience of change. At certain points during some shows, the reconciled world is already here, at least in that second, at that place. Operation Ivy was very lucky to have experienced this. Those seconds reveal that the momentum that drives a subculture is more important than any particular band. The momentum is made of all the people who stay interested, and keep their sense of urgency and hope. (J. from Operation Ivy)


Chasing After the Wind

I've heard them call it a waste of time
Maybe just a chasing after the wind
But this is how I commune with God
Where I become a spiritual being again

Cause if I dance all night, sing all day,
Maybe at the break of the dawn,
In the cool grey of the morning,
My heart will finally find its calm.

I just wish I could see myself at the end
And know that I wasn’t just chasing after the wind
Cause time seems to keep ticking away
Till there’s nothing left, only yesterday

Redeem...

I guess this is sort of my redemption song.

Redeem...

REDEEM...

I feel the weakness in my skin
No longer at peace
But at war from within

I cry in pain
But in Him I remain

Oh God, how I want to share Heaven with you...

If it wasn’t for this death kiss
My body’s natural affliction
Like a stinging cut to the wrist

I don’t want to do it on my own
I don’t want to end up in Hell all alone

Oh God, how I want to share Heaven with you...

Jehovah-rapha, I'd ask You to forgive me,
But I know Your help I'll deny,
I just don’t want to live another lie.

So all I can do is cry in pain,
Cry in pain for what remains.

Oh God, how I want to share Heaven with you...

I say to myself then, Will this be my ruin?
Should I hide inside my shadow
Till hellfire comes or I admit my wrongdoing?

Because what gets me is this quiet cull,
And so failure becomes my secret canticle.

Oh God, how I want to share Heaven with you...

And yes, I know Your story,
How You left Your Father in Heaven,
How You were emptied of all Your glory.

To be forsaken by the One You love,
You came to earth to die for those You love.

Oh God, how I want to share Heaven with you...

But I just stood there as we mocked Him,
Remembering, all You said was,
“Please… Father, forgive them.”

Telling us, Fight for the God of love.
Urging us, Fight for the God of love.

Oh God, how I want to share Heaven with you...

Lord, Your love never came in disguise,
You laid it all out there,
Only asking that we not compromise.

Help me rise above all of this impurity.
Grant me solace amidst my insecurity.

Oh God, how I want to share Heaven with you...

This isn’t just another dance,
It is my heart’s cry,
Calling once again for innocence.

Jah, You know, my heart’s rebellion is not of the chosen kind
Only the result of my inherent design.

Oh God, how I want to share Heaven with you...

Lord, I ask, for these things that I have seen and done,
Father, please forgive me,
Bless me in the sacrifice of Your Son.

So I surrender, I surrender all to You – All that I am, my pride, my anger
Just to get a glimpse – of Your hope, of Your love.

Oh God, how I want to share Heaven with you...

A Day's Refrain

A Day’s Refrain

I’m not depressed tonight
More tired of this fight
Give up, give in
We can’t slip this skin

and in this day’s refrain
I hear the singing of no pain
Stepping up to forfeit
My struggle, I quit

No more will disdain
Ever again wear my name
Or unhappiness the same.
Why did I even play this game?

In it, I find no peace
Only disease without cease
And in this day’s refrain
I long to feel no pain

So just forfeit
Give up, give in - quit
Sweet release or serenity
I ask them to envelop me presently

God, for You how I long
Grab thy hand - be strong
May I come to You? Feel me.
A day’s refrain, can I see? Heal me.